The Temptation of Thanatos

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August 15th. Although the sun had already set, there is still humidity in the air.

Sweat was pouring from my body as I ran up the stairs of my apartment.

[Goodbye]

A LINE message with only 4 words from my girlfriend.

I immediately understood what the message meant.

I went to work despite today being Obon and rushed to my apartment after preparing to go home.

Then I found her standing beyond the fence of the rooftop with empty eyes.

To be honest, this is already the 4th time I’ve seen her trying to jump and commit suicide.

There are 2 types of people in the world.

Desire to live── the people being ruled by ”Eros”.

Desire to die── the people being ruled by ”Thanatos”.

Most of the people in this world were the former, but she was undoubtedly the latter.

I knew that she was a person being ruled by “Thanatos” before I started dating her.

It’s not surprising because I saved her when she was trying to commit suicide on the rooftop, similar to now. That was how I met her.

She was the girl who recently moved into the same apartment as me. She had round, cute eyes and full lips. She had lovely facial features, and the delicate-looking girl stole my whole heart in an instant. I’m sure that it was something like love at first sight.

From that point on, I started talking about various things with her and we soon became friends.

It was as if she was an angel descending from heaven when I was living alone, feeling lonely while working in a black company[1].

[1] Dishonest business

I had a doubt in my mind.

Whenever she tries to commit suicide, she always contacts me. She’ll then wait there until I come to her.

I think I’m more certain that she’d die alone without anyone knowing, but…

Perhaps somewhere in her heart, she just wanted me to stop her from committing suicide and help her like how I did when we first met. I interpreted it in my own way.

Therefore, I’m running up the stairs again this time.

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