The General and His “Little Cauliflower” chapter 1

About two people

The brilliant general with outstanding military service, returned to the capital one day. However, he was greeted with a wedding contract decreed by the emperor, and felt struck by lightning. He nearly led the troops back to the border.

All his officers and soldiers flipped the table in anger, “Ha! This dog emperor wants to snatch the military power of the Liu family! The pitiful general had an illustrious name his entire life. He will now have to marry a man as his wife because of this military command!”

The general’s self-declared little lovers sobbed for three days and two nights, their eyes swollen like walnuts: “I have admired the general wholeheartedly since I was a child. I thought that when the general returned, I would enjoy the solid marriage I desired. But I did not foresee that Shizi… wuuu…”

The general’s little fans weeped and bawled: “Ah~~the general was asked to marry~Wuuu, Shizi is unreasonable~”

En. The day the brilliant general who had provided outstanding military service, Liu Bing, returned to the capital, he received an imperial edict. It was said that the little shizi[1] Di Feng had been weak and ill since he was a child. It was caused by too much Yin energy, according to the fortune-teller, and could only be suppressed by the Yang energy on the general’s body. The prince was devoted to his son. When he heard this, he immediately appointed people to plan a good banquet and scheduled the wedding for the next day after Liu Bing’s return to the capital.

“Your Majesty, this minister is a man, this minister… ,” the general frowned.

The emperor smiled but did not say anything.

“General, if you disobey the imperial edict, you will be beheaded,” said the head eunuch, smiling.

“What a joke!” exclaimed the general. “How can a stately 7 foot man be afraid?… ”

The emperor smiled but did not say anything.

“I heard His Highness Shizi found the lost rou jia mo[2] soon after his mother passed away,” the head eunuch interjected, smiling. “This recipe ah, there’s only one copy in the world,” the head eunuch said with a demonic grin.

The powerful body of the general shivered.

“Unique and unmatched.”

The general’s hands trembled.

“It’s one-of-a-kind~”

The general consented.

As a result, the big wedding went ahead as planned.

Shizi and the general were ushered to the bridal room after paying their respects in the main hall. The crowd pressed the general, and he drank one cup after another. When he returned to the chamber, he had the sensation that his entire body was about to float away. He pushed open the door and strode over to lift Shizi’s red veil.

Shizi’s skin was slightly flushed. He raised his head, took a shy glance at the general, and spoke softly: “General, I……”

Before he could say anything, the general shoved a handful of shelled peanuts into his mouth, “Hush! I’m hungry. I’ll let you eat them!”

“This general specially brought them back from Nan Jiang!” smirked the general.

Shizi: “……” He stared blankly as the general took the jiao bei jiu[3] from the table and then fished out a handful of specialty shelled peanuts from a small cloth bag.

The general smelled like wine and smiled foolishly, saying, “Come, we’ll drink and eat shelled peanuts!”

Shizi: “!!!”

They then finished the wedding wine and ate a handful of savory shelled peanuts.

Shizi awoke unhurriedly the next morning, his heart dark. He propped himself up, saw General Daren’s sleeping posture that stretched across the entire big bed, and felt compelled to return to the day the emperor bestowed the marriage. Shizi thought, I’d rather commit regicide or suicide.

He sighed helplessly before rising to take a bath. The clean clothes were stored on the small couch next to the bath. Shizi opened the door and walked out of the bath after getting dressed.

Ruhua, the maid, stepped forward, a smile on her face: “Good morning, my lady! Did you sleep well last night?”

For a brief moment, Shizi’s face was as black as the bottom of a pot: “… Not bad.”

The other maid, Cuihua, covered the smile on her lips with a hand: “And the general…?”

Shizi’s forehead was suddenly covered in blue veins: “… still sleeping.”

The little Imperial bodyguard relied on being Shizi’s playmate since childhood, and didn’t leave him any face: “The general was exhausted to death last night, haha… ”

Shizi took a deep breath and smiled at the young Imperial bodyguard.

Imperial bodyguard: “……” A shiver ran down his back.

The general awoke after a short while due to Ruhua and Cuihua’s frantic shaking.

“What are you doing…”

“General, wake up quickly! Wake up! Someone’s about to die!”

The general’s sleepiness vanished after hearing this. He jumped up and yelled angrily, “Who has the audacity to behave so abominably in this general’s house?! Someone, get my sword!”

Cuihua said quietly, “It’s Madam…”

“Madam?” The general was perplexed and scratched his head, asking, “What Madam?”

Ruhua was furious at him for failing to live up to expectations. Her face flushed, and she yelled, “His Highness Shizi!”

The general finally reacted with “Oh!” and again laid down: “Never mind. If there is a death in the house, I’ll accept responsibility when the time comes.”

Ruhua was moved and said: “General, you’re serious about Shizi…”

“After all, the emperor adores him, so it’s unlikely he’ll do anything to him.”

Ruhua: “……”

Cuihua remained expressionless. She bravely took a basin of steaming water, splashing it on top of the bed as she passed by.

Finally, the handsome and outstanding general daren with extraordinary abilities arose from his bed and made his way to the backyard alone.

There was nothing exotic in the backyard, except for a vast stretch of oilseed rape flowers. He remembered how much he liked these small flowers as a child. When the general’s grandmother found out about it, she immediately ordered a few servant girls to plant an endless field of oilseed rape flowers.

Spring had passed and autumn had arrived. His grandmother had passed away, but the flowers were flourishing.

He couldn’t help but smile when he remembered his grandmother. He bowed his head and saw a purple face. The little Imperial bodyguard was crawling on the path.

General: “……”

The general’s entire body shook.

The general turned around and considered fleeing.

The general failed because he was stopped in his tracks by the delicate and attractive young man in front of him.

The young man was dressed in black from head to toe, his phoenix eyes brimming with life. “Where are you going?” he demanded of the general.

The general remained silent. He gave him a sidelong glance before turning away.

But the general couldn’t help himself and took another look.

As he met his gaze, the young man’s ears turned bright red. He pretended to be ferocious: “Why are you staring at me!”

“You are really good-looking,” the general said, flashing two sharp and small tiger teeth.

The young man’s face flushed, and he averted his gaze: “That… that’s only natural. After all, I am the shizi… ”

“You resemble these flowers, ah!”

“……” says the young man.

In the end, it was young shizi’s heart that was harmed by this dog.

The young man… Sorry. Shizi snorted angrily, spun around in a rage, and walked away. He stepped on the pathetic little Imperial bodyguard who had just sobered up. He twitched twice before losing consciousness.

The general squatted down, patted the shoe prints on the back of the little Imperial bodyguard, said “good journey”, and stood up to look for his “flower.”

A certain flower darted away.

A certain general also flew away.

Two figures, one black and one white, dashed through the corridor, the hall, the kitchen, and finally turned toward the toilet.

Shizi collapsed, exclaiming, “Why are you chasing me!”

“Why are you running away?” the general sighed glumly.

His Royal Highness had been spoiled and pampered since childhood, and after running for so long had already reached his limit. He took a deep breath, came to a halt slowly, and gasped for air. He turned around, taking a step forward to look at the general, who was neither red-faced nor gasping behind him. Unfortunately, he stumbled on the foot he had placed on the ground, and was so terrified that he quickly shut his eyes.

The anticipated pain did not materialize. The long lashed Shizi opened his eyes slightly, and found himself lying in the arms of the general.

He struggled a little and muttered: “Get out of the way, you villain! You’re bullying me, you…”

The general embraced him, sighed, and said: “Your Highness Shizi.”

Shizi raised his head and asked: “You recognize me?”

The general nodded: “En, the emperor showed me your portrait.”

Shizi: “……” Shizi was furious and pushed him hard.

The general hugged him even tighter: “I know, my mouth is silly, my mind is also silly. I can’t comprehend anything. I have no idea why the emperor bestowed you to me.”

“Then you…”

“However” the general stated, “since you are married to me, I will undoubtedly be good to you. I will not let you be wronged. Madam will have the final say in this general’s house.”

Shizi’s cheeks flushed. He buried himself in the warm embrace and gently nodded, “En.” He closed his eyes, reluctant to give up this person’s distinct good scent. He sniffed and felt as if he were being held in the sun’s embrace.

The general bowed his head and kissed Shizi’s brow. He had a fleeting thought that he would like to live like this for the rest of his life.

A gentle breeze blew through, blowing green leaves.

“Huh? What’s this odor?… ” Shizi frowned.

The two raised their heads in unison, and at long last noticed the top-grade… toilet hidden behind a large area of green.

General: “… Er.”

The warm atmosphere was completely obliterated. Shizi was furious. He scowled at the general, covered his nose with both hands, and bolted.

… …

Shizi then ordered that flowers and shrubs be planted around the toilet. All of the exotic flowers from the Western region, such as plum, orchid, bamboo, and chrysanthemum, were relocated.

Everyone kept protesting, but the general just spread out his hands helplessly.

“There is nothing we can do. In this house, Madam has the final say,” he said tenderly, looking to the side where Shizi was puffing and blowing as he dug a hole with a trowel while commanding everyone.


Footnotes:

[1] Heir to a noble house.

[2] lit. meat wedged in steamed bun; “Chinese burger”; sliced meat sandwich popular in north China.

[3] Formal exchange of cups of wine between bride and groom as a traditional wedding ceremony.

Translator:

A silly little story~

The general agrees to the marriage because the unique recipe entices him. I admit that I only understood that part because the synopsis stated that the gong was a foodie.

Shizi and the general have undoubtedly met before. Shizi clearly expected a different response when he asked, “Do you recognize me?”

Did you realize Shizi retaliated against the guard for laughing at him?


The General and His “Little Cauliflower”

The General and His “Little Cauliflower”

大将军和他的“小菜花”
Score 8
Status: Completed Type: Author: , Released: 2021 Native Language: Chinese
The outstanding general Liu Bing is bestowed marriage to shizi* Di Feng on his return to the capital.Brain dead foodie General gong X violent and infatuated Shizi shou*Shizi = heir apparent.

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